On the man-made and/or artificial satellite Zelan, Chaz, Rika, and Rune are greeted by an automaton.
You...are you Wren?
Wow, you're huge!
In verity
my name is Wren.
This is the man-made satellite
Zelan, which has complete
control over all the
environmental systems for all
the planets in the Algo solar
system.
I am the android who manages
it all. Rika, finally
we meet face to face.
Translation Notes
So after going through the ROM and replacing almost every instance of "man-made" with "artificial", they missed a single instance of it here, in Wren's introduction.
Yes, Wren! I didn't know that
you were so tall!
And these other people?
These are my friends Chaz and Rune.
They're great pals!
Who and who are great pals?
Whatever. Anyway,
glad to meet you.
May Script
Demi told us that the cause
for the systems in Motavia to
run out of control could be
found here...
We've come to try to restore
the systems, but from the looks
of it, it doesn't seem likely.
Final Script
Demi told us that the reason
the systems in Motavia are
out of control could be
found here...
We've come to try to cure the problem but from the looks
of it, it doesn't seem likely.
May Script
That's right. Zelan is not
causing those systems in
Motavia to run out of control. Then again, we're not managing
them here either.
Final Script
That's right. Zelan is not
causing the systems in
Motavia to run out of control. We have no control at all.
What does this all mean?
May Script
Presently, Zelan is
losing power.
It is the man-made satellite
Kuran that is causing the
Motavian systems run amok.
Originally, Kuran was supposed
to play a supportive role to Zelan's functions but, somebody
has occupied Kuran and has
usurped control.
Final Script
Presently, Zelan is
losing power.
It is the artificial satellite
Kuran that is causing the
Motavian systems to run amok.
Originally, Kuran was supposed
to play a supportive role to Zelan, but somebody has
occupied Kuran and usurped our control.
Is that so? Since Zelan is at
the top of the chain of
command...
Demi must have determined
that it was Zelan that had
gone awry!
May Script
Zelan's telecommunication
functions have become
paralyzed, there isn't even
a way to communicate.
Final Script
Zelan's telecommunication
functions are paralyzed.
There isn't even
a way to communicate.
So that's why we were
incommunicado!
I was so worried!
Translation Notes
The May script is so full of grammatical errors and oddly phrased lines...and then it goes and busts out a perfectly fitting "incommunicado." Weird.
So this means we have to
go to Kuran!
May Script
Chaz, if it is OK with you,
may I accompany you?
Zelan is presently completely
cut off from all the other
systems. it is impossible to do any
system restoration from here.
I was planning to go to Kuran
to get the situation under
control.
Final Script
Chaz, if it is OK with you,
may I accompany you?
Zelan is presently completely
cut off from all the other
systems. It is impossible to do any
system restoration from here.
I was hoping to go to Kuran
to get the situation under
control.
Translation Notes
Slight change in intention here - Wren was planning to go to Kuran anyway in the May draft, while he was just hoping to get the chance in later English drafts.
Oh Wren, it would be so
reassuring if you came with us!
Wow...you have a lot of faith
in Wren!
Oh, yes! Wren and
Seed were my teachers!
May Script
This current situation was brought
about by my lack of power.
I must take responsibility.
It seems that Seed has made me
take responsibility too...
Final Script
This current situation was brought
about by my lack of power.
I must take responsibility.
It seems that Seed has left me
to be responsible, too...
Wren...
May Script
Well, why don't we get a move
on it!
Final Script
Why don't we get a move on!
Stop trying to take charge, Rune!
May Script
All right then, why don't you
take charge, that is,
if you can.
There is an unidentified energy
reaction coming from the engine
room.
Problems in the engine room...
that's bad.
Well, let's go see what's going
on!
I told you, stop taking charge!
Yikes! Who...who are you!?
May Script
Oh my, I've found out already.
Final Script
Oh my, I've been found out
already.
May Script
Well, the end result is the
same whether I sabotage the engine or kill you right here! You'll not be going to Kuran!
Final Script
Well, it doesn't matter now
whether I sabotage the engines or kill you right here! You're not getting to Kuran!
The party easily defeats the Chaos Sorceror.
Yippee!
It's great that we won...
Well, we're really out of
commission now.
Rune! Couldn't you have
applied a little bit of
self-control?!
Shut up! You're in no position
to talk!
May Script
We've gotten off our scheduled
orbit.
It's impossible to get back in
that orbit!
We will be able to make a crash
landing on 'Dezolis,'
the third planet in the system.
Shall we try?
Final Script
We're off our intended
flight-path.
It's impossible to get back in
that orbit!
We will be able to make a crash
landing on Dezolis,
the third planet in the system.
Shall we try?
What do you mean, 'shall we'?
We have no choice, do we?
This is true
One crash landing coming up.
Wheee! A crash landing! Cool!
What are you saying! Hey. Hey!
Are you OK? Hey!
May Script
Calm down Chaz. The adrenaline concentration in
your blood will rise if you get
too excited.
Final Script
Calm down,Chaz. You should endeavor not to let
your blood pressure become
too high.
Translation Notes
The release of adrenaline into the bloodstream leads to an increase in blood pressure.
The third planet in the
Algo solar system.
It's an extremely cold planet
covered in snow and ice.
The shuttle makes a successful landing on Dezolis...right on top of a moderately-sized temple.
Hmm...
We're safe but...
Wow!
What a flamboyant landing!
How strange.
It's raining machines!
Translation Notes
Oh boy, here we go. Raja makes a lot of puns. In the May draft, pretty much all of those puns are translated literally, so they make no sense. In the Japanese version, Raja uses the word "kikai" twice here, a word whose definitions include both "strange" and "machine." So there.
Huh?
You...who on earth are you?
May Script
Ahhh, it's a Dezolisian.
It's the first time
I've seen one!
Final Script
Ahhh, it's a Dezolisian.
It's the first one
I've ever seen!
Answer me, you bonehead!
You've destroyed an important
temple!
Oh, er, sorry, about that!
Chaz? Is anything wrong?
It looks like we've crushed
someone's house...
May Script
Huh?
Who are you people?
A girl with horns,
and a mechanical doll!
Final Script
Who are you people?
A girl with horns,
and a mechanical doll!
Karakuri puppet]] in the Japanese version. The term was translated literally here.
These are ears,
I tell you!!!
May Script
Please use the word
android, will you.
Final Script
Please use the word
android, will you?
May Script
What ever.
Final Script
An droid, the droid
-- whatever.
Translation Notes
Now Raja calls Wren "きざな男。", or "kiza no otoko". Kiza translates to smug, flashy, pompous, etc. but he's also making a play on the word "kizai", or "machinery." Oh, and otoko means man.
Faced with what pun to make here, the May draft just gives up entirely. Thankfully some actual wordplay was added in the August script.
May Script
Quiet, old fart!
Final Script
Quiet, you old fart!
(The game exits cutscene mode at this point.)
May Script
Hmm, I see...
From Motavia...
on a ship that flies.
That's extraordinary...
Final Script
Hmm, I see...
From Motavia...
on a ship that flies. Or flew, anybody, before it fell.
That's extraordinary... Four Motavians flee, fly -- and
fall, right on my Temple hall.
Translation Notes
Raja's third line in the Japanese script is "ソラぁトんでもない！", which seems to be combining "soratobu" (Meaning "to fly in the sky") with "tondemonai" (A word with several different meanings, but in this case, being an expression of incredulity.) Later drafts add some nice worldplay where Raja summarizes the whole situation.
The August script doesn't have a proper terminator on the last line, so it spills into Rika's line below.
Ha, ha, ha!
What a funny old man!
Ah...
Wren finishes looking over the shuttle.
Chaz, this shuttle is
done for.
It's beyond repair.
May Script
What shall we do!
Final Script
What shall we do?
Hey, old man.
My name is Raja!
You'd better remember that,
little girl.
Ah, yes...Raja.
Are there any facilities
where we can fix this ship?
None that I know of.
May Script
Then how are you going to
fix your ship.
August Script
Then how are you going to
fix our ship.
Final Script
Then how are you going to
fix our ship?
May Script
Hee, hee.
I have some welcome news
for you.
Final Script
I'm not. But...hee, hee...
I do have some welcome news
for you.
What, what, what, what?
May Script
There's another ship
that can travel the skies!
Final Script
There is another ship
that can travel the skies!
May Script
There are other spaceships in Dezolis?!
Final Script
There are other spaceships on Dezolis?!
May Script
Tell us where old man!
Final Script
Tell us where, old man!
May Script
Hee, hee, I'll tell
but on one condition.
Final Script
Hee, hee, okay I'll tell,
but on one condition.
A condition?
May Script
This sounds interesting,
take me along.
Final Script
This sounds interesting.
Take me along.
May Script
What?
Final Script
What?!
May Script
If you do I'll overlook the
destruction of the temple?
Final Script
If you do I'll overlook the
destruction of the temple.
Chaz, Rune, Rika, and Wren take a few steps away from Raja and huddle up.
I don't want to drag this
old man around with us...
what shall we do?
I don't mind.
I like him.
He's kind of interesting.
I don't think we have much choice.
May Script
You made a very practical
choice.
Final Script
It seems a very practical
choice.
Oh?
Everyone faces Raja again.
May Script
Then, let's go! Timing important here!
Final Script
Then, let's go!
May Script
Great!
Now listen carefully!
A long, long time ago,
Parmanians came here to Dezolis
on a ship that traveled the
skies.
It is said that the ship still exist in the town of their
descendants!
Final Script
Great!
Now listen carefully!
A long, long time ago,
Parmanians came here to Dezolis
on a ship that traveled the
skies.
It is said that the ship still exists in the town of their
descendants!
Is this true?
May Script
Of course!
Final Script
Of course it's true!
Chaz, under the circumstances,
we have no choice but to rely
on this information and go
there.
And where is this town?
It's a Parmanian town called
'Tyler'
a short distance northwest of
here!
Everyone,
let's get going!
The gang exits the Raja Temple and are confronted with a raging blizzard.
Wow!
What a heavy snow storm!
May Script
This has been going on for
three months now.
This planet has always had a
cold climate, but this storm
too much I don't know what to
make of it!
Final Script
This has been going on for
three months now.
This planet has always had a
cold climate, but even I have
never seen anything like this!
May Script
There must be an abnormality in
the Dezolian climate control
system.
Final Script
There must be a malfunction in
the Dezolisian climate control
system.
May Script
No, I bet the cause of all this
lies in The Garuberk Tower!
Final Script
No, I bet the cause of all this
lies in the Garuberk Tower!
The Garuberk Tower?
May Script
Raja, how do you know such a thing?
Final Script
Raja, what makes you think that?
May Script
It's a feeling I have! ...and by the way,
Final Script
It's a feeling I have. And my feelings are always good
-- get it?
The music stops.
May Script
the sick are patients!
Final Script
Translation Notes
The May line is a literal translation of the Japanese line (カンじゃ！！ …ちなみに病気の人はカンジャ！). In this case, the later drafts forgot to replace it with something new, leaving a conspicuously empty text box.
So this is the man-made
satellite Kuran that sent the
entire control system out of control!
Final Script
So this is the artificial
satellite Kuran that has sent
the entire planetary control
system out of whack.
May & August Scripts
My head is reeling!
Final Script
My head is out of whack! Man am I dizzy!
Translation Notes
In the Japanese version, Raja says his head is spinning (kurakura), except he says "kurankuran" instead, since he's on Kuran and all.
The later English versions adjust Chaz's line and rewrite Raja's, and now both versions have an appropriate pun about someone's head spinning. Neat!
Come on, let's go!
Yes, we must hurry to the main
control center!
You, you...
Shortly into Kuran, the party finds another interesting chest.
Hello. What's this?
May Script
It's the internal weapon unit
for Androids.
I surmise that it is the
'Hyper-Jammer' unit.
Final Script
It's an internal weapon unit
for Androids.
I surmise that it is a
Hyper-Jammer.
May Script
'Hyper-Jammer'?
Final Script
Hyper-Jammer?
May Script
It is an electronic battle
weapon that will temporarily paralyze the AI of machines
with strong electromagnetic
waves.
There seems to be no problem
in its specification, let's load it up in my body.
Final Script
It is a weapon that temporarily scrambles the AI of machines
with strong electromagnetic
waves.
There seems to be no incompatibility in its
specification, so let's install it.
Translation Notes
The May script has a more accurate description of what the weapon does: Stop mechanical enemies from attacking for a few turns. The word "scrambles" makes it seem like it would give enemies a "Confused"-like status effect.
The same installations noise play again, but the screen doesn't fade out this time. Hmm.
May Script
Device installed. 'Hyper-Jammer' can now be used.
Final Script
Device installed.
Hyper-Jammer can now be used.
Further into the satellite...
So this is the main control
center?
May & August Scripts
I'm going to search for the
cause of the abnormality right
away.
Final Script
I shall search for the cause of
the malfunction right away.
Wait! What's that?
What? Where?
Over there! In the shadows!
There's something horrible attached to the central computer: A giant blue-gray and purple mass of muscle and sinew with a sinister face.
What on earth?
This feeling of oppression...!
Dark...Force!
May & August Scripts
Did you say Dark Force!?
You mean the Dark Force who reveived Zio as a god?
Final Script
Did you say Dark Force!?
You mean the Dark Force who revived Zio as a god?
Translation Notes
The translator totally whiffed the second line. "あれが ジオが神とあがめていたダーク・ファルスだっていうのか？", is supposed to translate to something like, "You mean the Dark Force whom Zio revered as a god?" The subjects are wrong in the May script, and they seem to have mistyped revered as "reveived"; The final English script changed this to "revived."
May & August Scripts
It appears that Dark Force
is the cause of everything. Let's remove it.
Final Script
It appears that Dark Force
is the cause of everything. Let us remove it.
Easier said than done.
OK! I'm going for it!
Eventually, inevitably, Dark Force is destroyed.
Did we...do it?
Yep!
We've won!
OK Wren!
Get Kuran back to normal!
Roger!
May & August Scripts
Hmp...
Final Script
Hmph...
Rune,
can I ask you something?
What is it?
How did you know...that monster
was the Dark Force
Zio was talking about?
Ah!
...er...
I've seen it before.
What? What do mean
you've seen it before?!
I'll tell you sometime...
Just wait until then, will you?
Well...
Rune...
May & August Scripts
All functions have been recovered. Now all we have to
do is make some final
adjustments at Zelan.
What is the matter?
Final Script
All functions have been restored. Now all we have to
do is make some final
adjustments at Zelan.
What is the matter?
Everything is OK.
All the maintenance systems for
the Algo environment are
working properly.
Well, we've been through a lot,
but I guess we've solved
everything.
Wait!
Look at that!
May & August Scripts
The snowstorm hasn't stopped?
Has the control system for
Dezolis has been destroyed?
Final Script
The snowstorm hasn't stopped?
Has the control system for
Dezolis been destroyed?
Translation Notes
Both this and the next block of dialogue were mistranslated. "デゾリスのシステムも回復してるんだろ？" should be something like, "The control system for Dezolis is recovering too, isn't it?"
Yes. Everything is in
working order.
Translation Notes
"正しいコントロール信号が発信されているはずですが…。" should be something like, "The correct control signal should have been transmitted, but..." The conversation as it is in the English version doesn't make a lot of sense.
May Script
I TOLD YOU! Didn't I tell you
that the Garuberk Tower was
the cause!
The demons that live in the
Garuberk Tower are creating
the snowstorm!
Why don't you listen to me once
in a while!
Final Script
I TOLD YOU! Didn't I tell you
that the Garuberk Tower was
the cause?
The demons that live in the
Garuberk Tower are creating
the blizzard!
Why don't you listen to me once
in a while?!
May Script
Uh...hmm.
Final Script
Er...ahem.
Anyway, this means there is
some other cause for the
snowstorm in Dezolis, right?
May Script
If the snowstorm continues
unabated, there is a danger
that thr Parmanians and even
the Dezolisians will perish.
Final Script
If the snowstorm continues
unabated, there is a danger
that the Parmanians and even
the Dezolisians will perish.
There's no use just sitting
around thinking!
Let's go to Dezolis!
Yes!
I'll go too!
As the mission has not been
accomplished, I shall continue
my responsibilities.
This is getting interesting!
Hmmph...unless I go you won't
be able to get anything done,
eh, Chaz?
What with Dezolis in a wall of
ice we won't be able to move
around freely.
What shall we do?
May Script
If we use the 'Ice Digger' we
can break through walls of ice.
Final Script
If we use the Ice Digger we
can break through walls of ice.
May Script
'Ice Digger'?
What's that?
Final Script
Ice Digger?
What's that?
May Script
In planning for action on
Dezolis I had an ice breaking
car installed.
Final Script
In planning for action on
Dezolis I had an ice breaking
car built.
Translation Notes
Wren's lines in the Japanese version: "ゼランは いざというときは万能要塞としても機能します。デゾリスでの作戦行動を想定して破氷車両も搭載されています。" Roughly translated, "Zelan also functions as a universal fortress in case of an emergency. An ice-digging vehicle was loaded on board in case of tactical operations on Dezolis."
The May draft trimmed a lot of that out to the point of confusion. Wren didn't plan for action on Dezolis; He was only planning to go to Kuran and ended up crash-landing the shuttle. The final script makes even less sense. Who built that machine?! This whole thing is a mess.
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