Unused Functions

This is a sub-page of The Simpsons: Hit & Run/Unused Voice Clips.

Everything in this sub-page are unused functions that go unused by every character that has said variant of dialogue.

Answering Machine Dialogue#

There is leftover dialogue for an unused answering machine function. As all the characters here can be drivers, these were probably intended to be played when choosing their car from a phone booth in levels where they are suppressed. The format for this dialogue is "d_answer_charactercode_filename", with the "d" usually referring to these NPC drivers.

Agnes and Skinner#

Agnes and Skinner have a collaboration of voice clips for this function. Note that a modified version of Agnes' final line is actually used for the ambience heard in the ghost playgrounds in Level 7, although it is hard to hear.

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
d_answer_skn_01	"You have reached the Skinner residence. Please leave a concise message at--"	"Ha llamado a casa de los Skinner. Por favor, deje un mensaje escueto después de-"
d_answer_agn_01	"Seymour, what are you doing?"	"Seymour, ¿qué estás haciendo?"
d_answer_skn_02	"Recording an outgoing answering machine message."	"Estoy grabando el mensaje de salida en el contestador."
d_answer_agn_02	"Without my permission? You're grounded!"	"¿Sin mi permiso? ¡Estás castigado!"

Comic Book Guy#

Comic Book Guy has one instance of this function.

File Name	Audio	Transcript	Spanish audio	Transcript (Spanish)
d_answer_cbg_01		"Thank you for calling the Android's Dungeon. If you are calling about the screenplay I posted on my website, please leave your name and production company. If you don't have a production company, please hang up the phone!"		"Gracias por llamar a la Mazmorra del Androide. Si llama por el guion cinematográfico que he colgado en mi página web, por favor, deje su nombre y el de su productora. Si no tiene productora, ¡suelte el teléfono!"

Grampa#

Grampa has two dialogue instances for this function.

File Name	Audio	Transcript	Spanish audio	Transcript (Spanish)
d_answer_grp_01		"How do you use this crazy machine? It's so complicated! Awwww, I hate this techno-crap. I feel old."		"¿Cómo se usa esta disparatada máquina? ¡Es tan complicada! Odio la tecnobasura. Me siento viejo."
d_answer_grp_02		"Mayday! Mayday! I'm goin' down! I've got two Stukas on my tail! And they've stolen all the semolina! My biplane is comin' apart at the seams! snores French toast please"		"¡S.O.S.! ¡S.O.S! ¡Me han alcanzado! ¡Tengo dos Stukas en la cola, y me han robado la sémola! ¡Mi bimotor se está haciendo pedazos por momentos! snores Una tostada, por favor."

The end of the last voice clip was based on the Season 4 episode "So It's Come To This: A Simpson's Clip Show", in which while Grampa is in the middle of saying that he goes in and out of comas all the time, when, just like in the above clip, he abruptly falls asleep and wakes up saying, "French toast please."

Snake#

Snake has two dialogue instances for this function. Interestingly, Snake's dialogue filename uses a w at the beginning (which is referred to as the player character in most instances). The second instance is an alternate version of the first.

File Name	Audio	Transcript	Spanish audio	Transcript (Spanish)
w_answer_snk_01		"Yo, you've like reached the Gustavson residence. Mr. Gustavson can't come to the phone right now, but he is alive. Also, Gustavson gave me his house."		"Tío, has llamado, o sea, a casa de los Gustavson. El señor Gustavson no se puede poner ahora mismo, pero está vivo. Otra cosa, Gustavson me regaló esta casa."
w_answer_snk_01a		"Hello, you've reached like the Gustavson residence. Mr. Gustavson can't come to the phone right now, but he is totally alive. Um, also, Gustavson gave me his house."	-	-

Chief Wiggum#

Chief Wiggum has two dialogue instances for this function. The second instance is an alternate version of the first.

File Name	Audio	Transcript	Spanish audio	Transcript (Spanish)
d_answer_wig_01		"You have just reached the Springfield Police Department. We're out fighting cri- He, hahahaha.. and um, wheeze enforcing just-- justice.. Hahaha. Ahh, there, that should fool those idiots."		"Ha llamado a la Comisaría de Policía de Springfield. Hemos salido a combatir el- Je... el crimen, Je, je y-- Ji, ji, ji y defender la ley.. Ji, ji, ji. Ay, ya está. Con eso engañare a esos idiotas."
d_answer_wig_01a		"Hello, you have reached the Springfield Police Department. We're out fighting crime snort and um, ah, enforcing justice.. Hahaha! Ahh, that's good. That should fool those idiots. Eh hem Didn't I already hit the button? Ah darn."	-	-

AI Destroy Dialogue#

6 characters have dialogue for destroying AI cars, however it goes unused either due to a bug not allowing it to play, or it may have been removed intentionally. These dialogue lines follow either d_aidestroy_charactercode, w_aidestroy_charactercode, or both. The difference is that "d" dialogue is used for an NPC driver, while "w" is used in most cases for characters you're playing as.

Apu#

Apu has 8 AI destroy quotes, 4 of which being very close to direct copies, so close to each other that they don't warrant an individual upload.

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
`d_aidestroy_apu_excell` `w_aidestroy_apu_never`	"Never have I seen such excellence!"	"¡Nunca había visto semejante despliegue!"
d_aidestroy_apu_impress OR w_aidestroy_apu_impress	"I am most assurably impressed!"	"¡Estoy profundamente impresionado!"
d_aidestroy_apu_thrill OR w_aidestroy_apu_thrilling	"That was most thrilling!"	"¡Ha sido de lo más emocionante!"
d_aidestroy_apu_trem OR w_aidestroy_apu_trem	"Tremendous!"	"¡Tremendo!"

Bart#

Bart has 8 AI destroy quotes, 2 of which are the same audio, and the other 2 of which being very close to direct copies, so close to each other that they don't warrant an individual upload. The first two are the same, but under different files.

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
d_aidestroy_brt_01 OR w_aidestroy_brt_cool	"Mwahahaha, oh, that was the coolest!"	"Ju, ja, ji , ji, ji. ¡Cómo ha molado!"
d_aidestroy_brt_02 OR w_aidestroy_brt_mess	"Mess with the best, end up like the rest!"	"¡Con el mejor no te atreverás, o acabarás como los demás!"
d_aidestroy_brt_06 OR w_aidestroy_brt_rock	"Rock the cas-bah, dude!"	"¡Dale caña, tío!"
d_aidestroy_brt_08 OR w_aidestroy_brt_pay	"Just pay me now!"	"¡Págame ahora!"

Professor Frink#

Frink has unused four lines of AI destroy dialogue, likely intended to play as a secondary passenger inside the car. It's possible that it was intended for "Pocket Protector".

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
d_aidestroy_frk_01	"See you around, silly person."	"Hasta la vista, persona mema."
d_aidestroy_frk_02	"Farewell, slow person..."	"Adiós, persona lenta."
d_aidestroy_frk_03	"Glaiven!"	"¡Glaiemmmmm!
d_aidestroy_frk_04	"Gla-ha-haien..."	"Guaai-i-mmmm..."

Homer#

Homer has 4 AI destroy quotes. The first line is present in The Simpsons Skateboarding, which shares dialogue with both this game and The Simpsons: Road Rage.

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
w_aidestroy_hom_01	"Everyone sucks but meee-eee!"	"¡Todos son un petardo, menos yoooo!"
w_aidestroy_hom_02	"Homer, Homer, Homer!"	"¡Homer, Homer, Homer!"
w_aidestroy_hom_03	"You think you're better than me!?!"	"¡¿Te crees mejor que yo?!"
w_aidestroy_hom_04	"In your face!"	"¡Por la cara!"

Lisa#

Lisa has 8 AI destroy quotes, 4 of which are exactly identical to each other.

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
d_aidestroy_lis_01 OR w_aidestroy_lis_01	"Ha! Haha.. They didn't even see it coming."	"¡Je, je, je, je! Ni se han enterado siquiera."
d_aidestroy_lis_02 OR w_aidestroy_lis_02	"Gotcha!"	"¡Te pillé!"
d_aidestroy_lis_03 OR w_aidestroy_lis_03	"Take that!"	"¡Toma esa!"
d_aidestroy_lis_04 OR w_aidestroy_lis_04	"Brains have defeated brawn."	"El cerebro ha vencido al músculo."

Marge#

Marge has 6 AI destroy quotes.

File Name	Transcript	Transcript (Spanish)
w_aidestroy_mrg_01	"No more bad guy!"	"¡Se acabaron los malos!"
w_aidestroy_mrg_02	"Make room for Marge!"	"¡Hagan sitio a Marge!"
w_aidestroy_mrg_auto	"I'll call the auto club!"	"¡Llamaré a una grúa!"
w_aidestroy_mrg_hope	"I hope he's okay."	"Espero que esté bien."
w_aidestroy_mrg_house	"Marge is in the house!"	"Marge es quien manda."
w_aidestroy_mrg_wreckless	"One less reckless driver."	"Un conductor imprudente menos."

"d_missa" Dialogue#

For some reason, Cletus has one line that has "d_missa" instead of "d_missp" like all the other characters with this unused variant.

Cletus#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missa_clt_stay		"Oh I'm feeling Road Rage here!"

"d_missp" Dialogue#

d_missp is an unknown function for the driver of a vehicle probably missing a pedestrian, which goes unused. The dialogue for player characters is often reused in the w_missp section, so it is all listed there for those characters.

Cletus#

Cletus has 3 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_clt_lucky		"Woah, you was almost roadkill, boy!"
d_missp_clt_move		"Move it city slicker!"

d_missp_clt_sorry		"I'm powerful sorry!"

Comic Book Guy#

Comic Book Guy has 3 Unknown driver function quotes

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_cbg_fault		"Sorry but I'm Chaotic Evil!"
d_missp_cbg_orc		"Beat it you half-elf!"

d_missp_cbg_totally		"Oh, way to almost die, idiot!"

Professor Frink#

Professor Frink has 4 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_frk_01		"Woah!"
d_missp_frk_02		"Uh oh, Well that wasn't supposed to happen!"
d_missp_frk_03		"ZOIuhhhh!"
d_missp_frk_04		"Bad design!"

Grampa#

Grampa has 6 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_grp_01		"Sure beats sitting at home watching Oprah"
d_missp_grp_damna		"Damn leprechauns!"
d_missp_grp_dance		"Dance, pilgrim!"
d_missp_grp_going		"Going down! Going down!"
d_missp_grp_missed		"Missed 'em!"
d_missp_grp_oneday		"I see young people!"

Otto#

Otto has 3 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_oto_01		"Get outta the way man!"
d_missp_oto_02		"Watch your step!"
d_missp_oto_03		"Yeah I'm the greatest bus driver in all of Springfield! Well, the only one!"

Skinner#

Skinner has 7 Unknown driver function quotes, 4 of them featuring Agnes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_skn_01		"Stay outta the way"
d_missp_skn_02		"Keep your head down soldier!"
d_missp_skn_03		"Heh, That was my nearest miss yet."
d_missp_skn_buddy		"Agnes: Drive-by again so I can spit on the loser!" "Skinner: Fine, mother."
d_missp_skn_face		"Agnes: Stop looking at me, I want people to think we're related!" "Skinner: Yes, mother."
d_missp_skn_hit		"Agnes: He was asking for it Seymour, Let's run over his foot!" "Skinner: Yes, mother."
d_missp_skn_idiot		"Agnes: That person gave me a dirty look! Next time hit him good!" "Skinner: Whatever you say, mother."

Smithers#

Smithers has 3 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_smi_lively		"Step lively!"
d_missp_smi_relations		"That is not good for customer relations."
d_missp_smi_watch		"Watch it!"

Snake#

Snake has 4 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_snk_pizza		"Look out road pizza!"
d_missp_snk_pizzaa		"Look out, you're totally road pizza!"
d_missp_snk_selecta		"Oh I almost greased that guy!"
d_missp_snk_statistica		"Out of my way walking statistic!"

Wiggum#

Wiggum has 4 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
d_missp_wig_01		"Nothing to see here folks!"
d_missp_wig_02		"Alright, nothing to see here folks!"
d_missp_wig_home		"Maybe next time you'll stay at home!"
d_missp_wig_official		"Move aside! Official police recklessness!"

"w_missa" Dialogue#

w_missa is an unknown function for the player character missing something, with "a" being unknown.

Apu#

Apu has 4 Unknown driver function quotes.

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missa_apu_going		"Why don't you watch where you're going!?"
w_missa_apu_whitey		"Hey, move it whitey!"

Bart#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missa_brt_oof		"Get out of my way!"
w_missa_brt_right		"Slower traffic - to the right, please"
w_missa_brt_stop		"I can't stop!"
w_missa_brt_watch		"Watch it!"

"w_missp" Dialogue#

w_missp is a similar unknown function that would be used for the player missing likely a pedestrian.

Apu#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missp_apu_car		"You should have not stepped in front of my car"
w_missp_apu_dear		"Oh, dear!"
w_missp_apu_silly		"Get out of my way, silly pedestrian!"

Bart#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missp_brt_atcha		"Comin' at ya!"
w_missp_brt_cometh		"The Bartman cometh"
w_missp_brt_comin2		"Ho-ho! Coming through"
w_missp_brt_wanna		"Outta way, wannabe!"
w_missp_brt_way		"Outta my way, man!"

Homer#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missp_hom_01		"Get out of my way, jerkass!"
w_missp_hom_02		"I'll run you down!"
w_missp_hom_03		"Out of control!"
w_missp_hom_04		"No offence, buddy"

Lisa#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missp_lis_01		"Coming through!"
w_missp_lis_04		"Coming through!"
w_missp_lis_05		"Oooh! I'm out of control!"
w_missp_lis_06		"Naah! I'm out of control!"
w_missp_lis_07		"Huoh! I'm out of control!"
w_missp_lis_10		"My sincere apologies!"
w_missp_lis_13		"Look out!"

Marge#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_missp_mrg_01		"Look both ways next time"
w_missp_mrg_02		"Think fast, walky Joe!"
w_missp_mrg_important		"Sorry, but this is a very important mission!"
w_missp_mrg_make		"I'll make it up to you! Do you like brownies?"
w_missp_mrg_stay		"Stay outta my way - It's my time of the month!"
w_missp_mrg_tomorrow		"I'll be more careful...Starting tomorrow!"

Longjump Dialogue#

2 characters have "longjump" dialogue, which is probably meant to be used in conjunction with jump triggers, which boost the player car to make long jumps possible.

Apu#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_longjump_apu_excell		"Most excellent!"
w_longjump_apu_thrill		"That was most thrilling!"
w_longjump_apu_trem		"Tremendous!"

Lisa#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_longjump_lis_01		"Making it look easy"
w_longjump_lis_02		"Maybe I really am a jock!"
w_longjump_lis_cake		"I feel like Jesse Owens!"
w_longjump_lis_perfect		"Perfect ten!"
w_longjump_lis_plusplus		"Check, plus-plus!"
w_longjump_lis_triple		"That should get me an A+++ in gym"

Dodge Dialogue#

There's a "dodge" function that is triggered whenever the player is trying to run over an NPC. While technically it's used for Lisa as well, the player won't be able to hear it ingame, since every time Lisa spawns - she either is a vehicle driver or inside an interior, meaning that there is no legitimate way to trigger the dialogues.

Lisa#

File Name	Audio	Transcript
w_dodge_lis_01		"Don't think I won't sue!"
w_dodge_lis_02		"That is assault! That is assault!"
w_dodge_lis_03		"Hey!"
w_dodge_lis_04		"Come back here!"